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| Letter to a Young Widow.
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letter to a young widow.
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1. That you have
sustained a severe blow, and that the weapon directed from above
has been planted in a vital part all will readily admit, and none
even of the most rigid moralists will deny it; but since they who
are stricken with sorrow ought not to spend their whole time in
mourning and tears, but to make good provision also for the healing
of their wounds, lest, if they be neglected their tears should
aggravate the wound, and the fire of their sorrow become inflamed,
it is a good thing to listen to words of consolation, and
restraining for a brief season at least the fountain of thy tears
to surrender thyself to those who endeavour to console thee. On
this account I abstained from troubling you when your sorrow was at
its height, and the thunderbolt had only just fallen upon you; but
having waited an interval and permitted you to take your fill of
mourning, now that you are able to look out a little through the
mist, and to open your ears to those who attempt to comfort you, I
also would second the words of your handmaids by some contributions
of my own. For whilst the tempest is still severe, and a full gale
of sorrow is blowing, he who exhorts another to desist from grief
would only provoke him to increased lamentations and having
incurred his hatred would add fuel to the flame by such speeches
besides being regarded himself as an unkind and foolish person. But
when the troubled water has begun to subside, and God has allayed
the fury of the waves, then we may freely spread the sails of our
discourse. For in a moderate storm skill may perhaps play its part;
but when the onslaught of the wind is irresistible experience is of
no avail. For these reasons I have hitherto held my peace, and even
now have only just ventured to break silence because I have heard
from thy uncle that one may begin to take courage, as some of your
more esteemed handmaids are now venturing to discourse at length
upon these matters, women also outside your own household, who are
your kinsfolk, or are otherwise qualified for this office. Now if
you allow them to talk to you I have the greatest hope and
confidence that you will not disdain my words but do your best to
give them a calm and quiet hearing. Under any circumstances indeed
the female sex is the more apt to be sensitive to suffering; but
when in addition there is youth, and untimely widowhood, and
inexperience in business, and a great crowd of cares, while the
whole life previously has been nurtured in the midst of luxury, and
cheerfulness and wealth, the evil is increased many fold, and if
she who is subjected to it does not obtain help from on high even
an accidental thought will be able to unhinge her. Now I hold this
to be the foremost and greatest evidence of God’s care concerning
thee; for that thou hast not been overwhelmed by grief, nor driven
out of thy natural condition of mind when such great troubles
suddenly concurred to afflict thee was not due to any human
assistance but to the almighty hand the understanding of which
there is no measure, the wisdom which is past finding out, the
“Father of mercies and the God of all comfort.”334
“For He
Himself” it is said “hath smitten us, and He will heal us; He
will strike, and He will dress the wound and make us whole.”335
For as long as that blessed husband of thine
was with thee, thou didst enjoy honour, and care and zealous
attention; in fact you enjoyed such as you might expect to enjoy
from a husband; but since God took him to Himself He has supplied
his place to thee. And this is not my saying but that of the
blessed prophet David for he says “He will take up the fatherless
and the widow,”336
and
elsewhere he calls
Him “father of the fatherless and judge of the widow;”337
thus in many
passages thou wilt see that He earnestly considereth the cause of
this class of mankind.
2. But lest the continual repetition of this
name of widow should upset thy soul, and disconcert thy reason,
having been inflicted on thee in the very flower of thy age, I wish
first of all to discourse on this point, and to prove to you that
this name of widow is not a title of calamity but of honour, aye
the greatest honour. For do not quote the erroneous opinion of the
world as a testimony, but the admonition of the blessed Paul, or
rather of Christ. For in his utterances Christ was speaking through
him as he himself said “If ye seek a proof of Christ who is
speaking in me?”338
What then does he say? “Let not a
widow be enrolled under threescore years of age” and again “but
the younger widows refuse”339
intending by both these sayings to
indicate to us the importance of the matter. And when he is making
regulations about bishops he nowhere prescribes a standard of age,
but in this case he is very particular on the point, and, pray, why
so? not because widowhood is greater than priesthood, but because
widows have greater labour to undergo than priests, being
encompassed on many sides by a variety of business public and
private. For as an unfortified city lies exposed to all who wish to
plunder it, so a young woman living in widowhood has many who form
designs upon her on every side not only those who aim at getting
her money but also those who are bent upon corrupting her modesty.
And besides these we shall find that she is subjected to other
conditions also likely to occasion her fall. For the contempt of
servants their negligence of business, the loss of that respect
which was formerly paid, the sight of contemporaries in prosperity,
and often the hankering after luxury, induce women to engage in a
second marriage. Some there are who do not choose to unite
themselves to men by the law of marriage, but do so secretly and
clandestinely. And they act thus in order to enjoy the praise of
widowhood; thus it is a state which seems to be not reproached, but
admired and deemed worthy of honour among men, not only amongst us
who believe, but even amongst unbelievers also. For once when I was
still a young man I know that the sophist who taught me340
(and he
exceeded all men in his reverence for the gods) expressed
admiration for my mother before a large company. For enquiring, as
was his wont, of those who sat beside him who I was, and some one
having said that I was the son of a woman who was a widow, he asked
of me the age of my mother and the duration of her widowhood, and
when I told him that she was forty years of age of which twenty had
elapsed since she lost my father he was astonished and uttered a
loud exclamation, and turning to those present “Heavens!” cried
he “what women there are amongst the Christians.” So great is
the admiration and praise enjoyed by widowhood not only amongst
ourselves, but also a amongst those who are outside the Church. And
being aware of all this the blessed Paul said “Let not a widow be
enrolled under threescore years of age.” And even after this
great qualification of age he does not permit her to be ranked in
this sacred society but mentions some additional requisites “well
reported of for good works, if she have brought up children if she
have lodged strangers if she have washed the saints feet if she
have relieved the afflicted, if she have diligently followed every
good work.”341
Heavens!
what testing and scrutiny! how much virtue does he demand from the
widow, and how precisely does he define it! which he would not have
done, had he not intended to entrust to her a position of honour
and dignity. And “the younger widows” he says “refuse;” and
then he adds the reason: “for when they have waxed wanton against
Christ they will marry.”342
By this expression he gives us to
understand that they who have lost their husbands are wedded to
Christ in their stead. Observe how he asserts this by way of
indicating the mild and easy nature of this union; I refer to the
passage “when they have waxed wanton against Christ they will
marry,” as if He were some gentle husband who did not exercise
authority over them, but suffered them to live in freedom. Neither
did Paul confine his discourse on the subject to these remarks, but
also in another place again he has manifested great anxiety about
it where he says “Now she who liveth in pleasure is dead while
she liveth; but she who is a widow indeed and desolate hath set her
hope in God, and continueth in prayers and supplications day and
night.”343
And writing
to the Corinthians he says “But she is more blessed if she abide
thus.”344
You see what
great praise is bestowed upon widowhood, and this in the New
Testament, when the beauty of virginity also was clearly brought to
light. Nevertheless even the lustre of this state could not obscure
the glories of widowhood, which shines on brightly all the same,
keeping its own value. When then we make mention of widowhood from
time to time, do not be cast down, nor consider the matter a
reproach; for if this be
a matter of reproach, far more so is virginity. But this is not the
case; no! God forbid. For inasmuch as we all admire and welcome
women who live continently whilst their husbands are yet alive must
we not be delighted with those who manifest the same good feeling
concerning their husbands when they have departed this, life, and
praise them accordingly? As I was saying then, as long as you lived
with the blessed Therasius you enjoyed honour and consideration
such as is natural for a wife to receive from a husband; but now in
his place you have God who is the Lord of all, who hath of old been
thy protector and will be so now still more and with yet greater
earnestness; and as I have already said He hath displayed no slight
token of his providential care by having preserved thee whole and
unharmed in the midst of such a furnace of anxiety and sorrow, and
not suffering thee to undergo anything undesirable. Now if He has
not permitted any shipwreck to take place in the midst of so much
rough water, much more will He preserve thy soul in calm weather
and lighten the burden of thy widowhood, and the consequences of it
which seem to be so terrible.
3. Now if it is not the name of widow which
distresses you, but the loss of such a husband I grant you that all
the world over amongst men engaged in secular affairs there have
been few like him, so affectionate, so gentle, so humble, so
sincere, so understanding, so devout. And certainly if he had
altogether perished, and utterly ceased to be, it would be right to
be distressed, and sorrowful; but if he has only sailed into the
tranquil haven, and taken his journey to Him who is really his
king, one ought not to mourn but to rejoice on these accounts. For
this death is not death, but only a kind of emigration and
translation from the worse to the better, from earth to heaven,
from men to angels, and archangels, and Him who is the Lord of
angels and archangels. For here on earth whilst he was serving the
emperor there were dangers to be expected and many plots arising
from men who bore ill-will, for in proportion as his reputation
increased did the designs also of enemies abound; but now that he
has departed to the other world none of these things can be
suspected. Wherefore in proportion as you grieve that God has taken
away one who was so good and worthy you ought to rejoice that he
has departed in much safety and honour, and being released from the
trouble which besets this present season of danger, is in great
peace and tranquillity. For is it not out of place to acknowledge
that heaven is far better than earth, and yet to mourn those who
are translated from this world to the other? For if that blessed
husband of thine had been one of those who lived a shameful life
contrary to what God approved it would have been right to bewail
and lament for him not only when he had departed, but whilst he was
still living; but inasmuch as he was one of those who are the
friends of God we should take pleasure in him not only whilst
living, but also when he has been laid to rest. And that we ought
to act thus thou hast surely heard the words of the blessed Paul
“to depart and to be with Christ which is far better.”345
But perhaps
you long to hear your husband’s words, and enjoy the affection
which you bestowed upon him, and you yearn for his society, and the
glory which you had on his account, and the splendour, and honour,
and security, and all these things being gone distress and darken
your life. Well! the affection which you be stowed on him you can
keep now just as you formerly did.
For such is the power of love, it embraces, and
unites, and fastens together not only those who are present, and
near, and visible but also those who are far distant; and neither
length of time, nor separation in space, nor anything else of that
kind can break up and sunder in pieces the affection of the soul.
But if you wish to behold him face to face (for this I know is what
you specially long for) keep thy bed in his honour sacred from the
touch of any other man, and do thy best to manifest a life like
his, and then assuredly thou shalt depart one day to join the same
company with him, not to dwell with him for five years as thou
didst here, nor for 20, or 100, nor for a thousand or twice that
number but for infinite and endless ages. For it is not any
physical relation, but a correspondence in the way of living which
qualifies for the inheritance of those regions of rest. For if it
was identity of moral constitution which brought Lazarus although a
stranger to Abraham into the same heavenly bosom with him, and
qualifies many from east and west to sit down with him, the place
of rest will receive thee also with the good Therasius, if thou
wilt exhibit the same manner of life as his, and then thou shalt
receive him back again no longer in that corporeal beauty which he
had when he departed, but in lustre of another kind, and splendour
outshining the rays of the sun. For this body, even if it reaches a
very high standard of beauty is nevertheless perishable; but the
bodies of those who have been well pleasing to God, will be
invested with such glory as these eyes cannot even look upon. And
God has furnished us with certain tokens, and obscure indications
of these things both in the Old and in the New
Dispensation. For in the former the face of Moses
shone with such glory as to be intolerable to the eyes of the
Israelites, and in the New the face of Christ shone far more
brilliantly than his. For tell me if any one had promised to make
your husband king of all the earth, and then had commanded you to
withdraw for twenty years on his account, and had promised after
that to restore him to you with the diadem and the purple, and to
place you again in the same rank with him, would you not have
meekly endured the separation with due self-control? Would you not
have been well pleased with the gift, and deemed it a thing worth
praying for? Well then submit to this now, not for the sake of a
kingdom on earth, but of a kingdom in Heaven; not to receive him
back clad in a vesture of gold but robed in immortality and glory
such as is fitting for them to have who dwell in Heaven. And if you
find the trial very unbearable owing to its long duration, it may
be that he will visit you by means of visions and converse with you
as he was wont to do, and show you the face for which you yearn:
let this be thy consolation taking the place of letters, though
indeed it is far more definite than letters. For in the latter case
there are but lines traced with the pen to look upon, but in the
former you see the form of his visage, and his gentle smile, his
figure and his movements, you hear his speech and recognize the
voice which you loved so well.
4. But since you mourn also over the loss of
security which you formerly enjoyed on his account, and perhaps
also for the sake of those great hopes of distinction which were
dawning (for I used to hear that he would speedily arrive at the
dignity of præfect, and this, I fancy, it is which more especially
upsets and distresses thy soul) consider I pray the case of those
who have been in a higher official position than his, and yet have
brought their life to a very pitiable end. Let me recall them to
your memory: you probably know Theodore of Sicily by reputation:346
| 346 According to Ammianus Marcellinus, B. xxxiv., this
Theodore was a native of Gaul. He is probably called Theodore of
Sicily by Chrysostom because he attempted to make himself a tyrant
in that island. He was executed for treason in the year 371. | for he was
one of the most distinguished men; he surpassed all in bodily
stature and beauty as well as in the confidence which he enjoyed
with the Emperor, and he had more power than any member of the
royal household, but he did not bear this prosperity meekly, and
having entered into a plot against the Emperor he was taken
prisoner and miserably beheaded; and his wife who was not a whit
inferior to thy noble self in education and birth and all other
respects was suddenly stripped of all her possessions, deprived
even of her freedom also, and enrolled amongst the household
slaves, and compelled to lead a life more pitiable than any
bondmaid, having this advantage only over the rest that owing to
the extreme severity of her calamity she moved to tears all who
beheld her. And it is said also that Artemisia who was the wife of
a man of high reputation, since he also aimed at usurping the
throne, was reduced to this same condition of poverty, and also to
blindness; for the depth of her despondency, and the abundance of
her tears destroyed her sight; and now she has need of persons to
lead her by the hand, and to conduct her to the doors of others
that she may obtain the necessary supply of food.347
| 347 I have not been able to discover any further
information concerning Artemisia or her husband. | And I might mention many other
families which have been brought down in this way did I not know
thee to be too pious and prudent in disposition to wish to find
consolation for thy own calamity out of the misfortunes of others.
And the only reason why I mentioned those instances to which I
referred just now was that you might learn that human things are
nothingness but that truly as the prophet says “all the glory of
man is as the flower of grass.”348
For in proportion to men’s
elevation and splendour is the ruin wrought for them, not only in
the case of those who are under rule, but also of the rulers
themselves. For it would be impossible to find any private family
which has been immersed in such great calamities as the ills in
which the imperial house has been steeped. For untimely loss of
parents, and of husbands, and violent forms of death, more
outrageous and painful than those which occur in tragedies,
especially beset this kind of government.
Now passing over ancient times, of those who
have reigned in our own generation, nine in all, only two have
ended their life by a natural death; and of the others one was
slain by a usurper,349
| 349 Constans by Magnentius. | one in battle,350
| 350 Constantine the younger. | one by a conspiracy of his
household guards,351
| 351 Jovian: there were several other versions of his
death. See Gibbon, iv. 221 (Milman’s edition). Chrysostom repeats
this story in Homily XV., ad Philipp. | one by the
very man who elected him, and invested him with the purple,352
| 352 Gallus Cæsar (who never became Augustus) by
Constantius. | and of their
wives some, as it is reported, perished by poison, others died of
mere sorrow; while of those who still survive one, who has an
orphan son, is trembling with alarm lest any of those who are in
power dreading what may happen in the future should destroy him;353
| 353 Widow of Jovian, whose son Varronianus had been
deprived of one eye (see Gibbon as above). | another has
reluctantly yielded to much entreaty to return from the exile
into which she had
been driven by him who held the chief power.354
| 354 Doubtful, possibly first wife of Valentinian I.,
divorced from him and sent into exile. | And of the wives of the present
rulers the one who has recovered a little from her former
calamities has much sorrow mingled with her joy because the
possessor of power is still young and inexperienced and has many
designing men on all sides of him;355
| 355 Constantia, wife of Gratian. | and the other is ready to die of
fear, and spends her time more miserably than criminals condemned
to death because her husband ever since he assumed the crown up to
the present day has been constantly engaged in warfare and
fighting, and is more exhausted by the shame and the reproaches
which assail him on all sides than by actual calamities.356
| 356 Flacilla, wife of Theodosius. The two emperors who
died natural deaths were Constantine the Great, and his son
Constantius. Compare this mournful list with the celebrated passage
in Shakespeare’s Richard II., act III. sc. 2.
“For Heaven’s sake let’s sit
upon the ground
And tell sad stories of the death of
kings,” etc. | For that
which has never taken place has now come to pass, the barbarians
leaving their own country have overrun an infinite space of our
territory, and that many times over, and having set fire to the
land, and captured the towns they are not minded to return home
again, but after the manner of men who are keeping holiday rather
than making war, they laugh us all to scorn;357
and it is said that one of their
kings declared that he was amazed at the impudence of our soldiers,
who although slaughtered more easily than sheep still expect to
conquer, and are not willing to quit their own country; for he said
that he himself was satiated with the work of cutting them to
pieces. Imagine what the feelings of the Emperor and his wife must
be on hearing these words!
5. And since I have made mention of this war, a
great crowd of widows has occurred to me, who in past times derived
very great lustre from the honour enjoyed by their husbands, but
now are all arrayed in a dark mourning robe and spend their whole
time in lamentation. For they had not the advantage which was
enjoyed by thy dear self. For thou, my excellent friend, didst see
that goodly husband of thine lying on his bed, and didst hear his
last words, and receive his instructions as to what should be done
about the affairs of the family, and learn how by the provisions of
his will they were guarded against every kind of encroachment on
the part of rapacious and designing men. And not only this, but
also when he was yet lying dead thou didst often fling thyself upon
the body, and kiss his eyes, and embrace him, and wail over him,
and thou didst see him conducted to burial with much honour, and
didst everything necessary for his obsequies, as was fitting, and
from frequent visits to his grave thou hast no slight consolation
of thy sorrow. But these women have been deprived of all these
things, having all sent out their husbands to war in the hope of
receiving them back again, instead of which it has been their lot
to receive the bitter tidings of their death. Neither has any one
come back to them with the bodies of their slain, or bringing
anything save a message describing the manner of their death. And
some there are who have not even been vouchsafed this record, or
been enabled to learn how their husbands fell, as they were buried
beneath a heap of slain in the thick of battle.
And what wonder if most of the generals
perished thus, when even the Emperor himself having been blockaded
in a certain village with a few soldiers did not dare to go out and
oppose the assailants, but remained inside and when the enemy had
set fire to the building was burnt to death together with all that
were therein, not men only, but horses, beams and walls, so that
the whole was turned into a heap of ashes? And this was the tale
which they who departed to war with the Emperor brought back to his
wife in place of the Emperor himself.358
| 358 The best account of the destruction of the Emperor
Valens and his army in the battle of Hadrianople A.D. 378, is to be
found in Hodgkin’s “Italy and her Invaders,” vol. i. pp.
120–6 (Clarendon Press, Oxford). | For the splendours of the world
differ in no-wise whatever from the things which happen on the
stage, and the beauty of spring flowers. For in the first place
they flee away before they have been manifested; and then, even if
they have strength to last a little while, they speedily become
ready to decay. For what is more worthless than the honour and
glory which is paid by the multitude? what fruit has it? what kind
of profit? what serviceable end does it meet? And would that this
only was the evil! but in fact besides failing to get anything good
from the possession, he who owns this most cruel mistress is
continually forced to bear much which is painful and injurious; for
mistress she is of those who own her, and in proportion as she is
flattered by her slaves does she exalt herself against them, and
ties them down by increasingly harsh commands; but she would never
be able to revenge herself on those who despise and neglect her; so
much fiercer is she than any tyrant and wild beast. For tyrants and
wild animals are often mollified by humouring, but her fury is
greatest when we are most complaisant to her, and if she finds any
one who will listen to her, and yield to her in everything there is
no kind of command from which in future she can be induced to
abstain. Moreover she
has also another ally whom one would not do wrong to call her
daughter. For after she herself has grown to maturity and fairly
taken root amongst us, she then produces arrogance, a thing which
is no less able than herself to drive the soul of those who possess
it into headlong ruin.
6. Tell me then dost thou lament this that God hath
reserved thee from such a cruel bondage, and that He has barred
every avenue against these pestilential diseases? For whilst thy
husband was living they ceased not continually assaulting the
thoughts of thy heart, but since his death they have no starting
point whence they can lay hold of thy understanding. This then is a
discipline which ought to be practised in future—to abstain from
lamenting the withdrawal of these evils, and from hankering after
the bitter tyranny which they exercise. For where they blow a heavy
blast they upset all things from the foundation and shatter them to
pieces; and just as many prostitutes, although by nature ill
favoured and ugly, do yet by means of enamels and pigments excite
the feelings of the youthful whilst they are still tender, and when
they have got them under their control treat them more insolently
than any slave; so also do these passions, vainglory and arrogance,
defile the souls of men more than any other kind of pollution.
On this account also wealth has seemed to the
majority of men to be a good thing; at least when it is stripped of
this passion of vainglory it will no longer seem desirable. At any
rate those who have been permitted to obtain in the midst of their
poverty popular glory have no longer preferred wealth, but rather
have despised much gold when it was bestowed upon them. And you
have no need to learn from me who these men were, for you know them
better than I do, Epaminondas, Socrates, Aristeides, Diogenes,
Krates who turned his own land into a sheep walk.359
| 359 Krates was a cynic philosopher, a disciple of
Diogenes. He flourished about 330 B.C. He was heir to a large
fortune, but bestowed the whole of it upon his native city Thebes.
Diogenes Laertius relates many curious stories about him. | The others indeed, inasmuch as it
was not possible for them to get rich, saw glory brought to them in
the midst of their poverty, and straightway devoted themselves to
it, but this man threw away even what he possessed; so infatuated
were they in the pursuit of this cruel monster. Let us not then
weep because God has rescued us from this shameful thraldom which
is an object of derision and of much reproach; for there is nothing
splendid in it save the name it bears, and in reality it places
those who possess it in a position which belies its appellation,
and there is no one who does not laugh to scorn the man who does
anything with a view to glory. For it is only he who has not an eye
to this who will be enabled to win respect and glory; but he who
sets a great value on popular glory, and does and endures
everything for the sake of obtaining it is the very man who will
fail to attain it, and be subjected to all the exact opposites of
glory, ridicule, and accusation, scoffing, enmity and hatred. And
this is wont to happen not only among men, but also among you
women, and indeed more especially in your case. For the woman who
is unaffected in mien, and gait, and dress, and seeks no honour
from any one is admired by all women, and they are ecstatic in
their praise and call her blessed, and invoke all manner of good
things upon her; but a vain-glorious woman they behold with
aversion and detestation, and avoid her like some wild beast and
load her with infinite execrations and abuse. And not only do we
escape these evils by refusing to accept popular glory, but we
shall gain the highest advantages in addition to those which have
been already mentioned, being trained gradually to loosen our hold
of earth and move in the direction of heaven, and despise all
worldly things. For he who feels no need of the honour which comes
from men, will perform with security whatever good things he does,
and neither in the troubles, nor in the prosperities of this life
will he be very seriously affected; for neither can the former
depress him, and cast him down, nor can the latter elate and puff
him up, but in precarious and troubled circumstances he himself
remains exempt from change of any kind. And this I expect will
speedily be the case with your own soul, and having once for all
torn yourself away from all worldly interests you will display
amongst us a heavenly manner of life, and in a little while will
laugh to scorn the glory which you now lament, and despise its
hollow and vain mask. But if you long for the security which you
formerly enjoyed owing to your husband, and the protection of your
property, and immunity from the designs of any of those persons who
trample upon the misfortunes of others “Cast thy care upon the
Lord and He will nourish thee.”360
“For look,” it is said, “to
past generations and see, who ever placed his hope on the Lord and
was put to shame, or who ever called upon Him, and was neglected,
or who ever remained constant to His commandments and was
forsaken?”361
For He who
has alleviated this intolerable calamity, and placed you even now
in a state of tranquillity will also avert impending evils; for
that you will never receive another blow more severe than this you
would yourself admit.
Having then so bravely borne present troubles,
and this when you were inexperienced, you will far more easily
endure future events should any of the things contrary to our
wishes, which God forbid, occur. Therefore seek Heaven, and all
things which conduce to life in the other world, and none of the
things here will be able to harm thee, not even the world-ruler of
darkness himself, if only we do not injure ourselves. For if any
one deprives us of our substance, or hews our body in pieces, none
of these things concern us, if our soul abides in its
integrity.
7. Now, once for all, if you wish your property to
abide with you in security and yet further to increase I will show
thee the plan, and the place where none of those who have designs
upon it will be allowed to enter. What then is the place? It is
Heaven. Send away thy possessions to that good husband of thine and
neither thief, nor schemer, nor any other destructive thing will be
able to pounce upon them. If you deposit these goods in the other
world, you will find much profit arising from them. For all things
which we plant in Heaven yield a large and abundant crop, such as
might naturally be expected from things which have their roots in
Heaven. And if you do this, see what blessings you will enjoy, in
the first place eternal life and the things promised to those who
love God, “which eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have
they entered into the heart of man,” and in the second place
perpetual intercourse with thy good husband; and you will relieve
yourself from the cares and fears, and dangers, and designs, and
enmity and hatred which beset you here. For as long as you are
surrounded with this property there will probably be some to make
attempts upon it; but if you transfer it to Heaven, you will lead a
life of security and safety, and much tranquillity, enjoying
independence combined with godliness. For it is very irrational,
when one wishes to buy land, and is seeking for productive ground,
if, Heaven being proposed to him instead of earth, and the
possibility presented of obtaining an estate there he abides still
on earth, and puts up with the toils that are connected with it;
for it often disappoints our hopes.
But since thy soul is grievously upset and
vexed on account of the expectation often entertained that thy
husband would attain the rank of prefect, and the thought that he
was untimely snatched away from that dignity consider first of all
this fact, that even if this hope was a very well grounded one
nevertheless it was only a human hope, which often falls to the
ground; and we see many things of this kind happening in life,
those which were confidently expected having remained unfulfilled,
whereas those which never even entered the mind have frequently
come to pass, and this we constantly see occurring everywhere in
cases of governments and kingdoms, and inheritances, and marriages.
Wherefore even if the opportunity were very near at hand, yet as
the proverb says “between the cup and the lip there is many a
slip” and the Scripture saith “from the morning until the
evening the time is changed.”362
So also a king who is here to-day is dead
tomorrow; and again this same wise man illustrating the reversal of
men’s hopes says “many tyrants have sat down upon the ground,
and one that was never thought of has worn the crown.”363
And it was
not absolutely certain that if he lived he would arrive at this
dignity; for that which belongs to the future is uncertain, and
causes us to have various suspicions. For on what grounds was it
evident that had he lived he would have attained that dignity and
that things would not have turned out the other way, and that he
would have lost the office he actually held either from falling a
victim to disease, or from being exposed to the envy and ill will
of those who wished to excel him in prosperity, or from suffering
some other grievous misfortune. But let us suppose, if you please,
that it was perfectly evident that in any case had he survived he
would have obtained this high distinction; then in proportion to
the magnitude of the dignity would have been the increased dangers,
and anxieties, and intrigues which he must have encountered. Or put
these even on one side, and let us suppose him to traverse that sea
of difficulties safely, and in much tranquillity; then tell me what
is the goal? not that which he has now reached; no, not that, but
something different, probably unpleasant and undesirable. In the
first place his sight of heaven, and heavenly things would have
been delayed, which is no small loss to those who have put their
trust in things to come; and in the next place, even had he lived a
very pure life yet the length of his life and the exigencies of his
high office would have prevented his departing in such a pure
condition as has now been the case. In fact it is uncertain whether
he might not have undergone many changes and given way to indolence
before he breathed his last. For now we are confident that by the
grace of God he has taken his flight to the region of rest, because
he had not committed himself to any of those deeds which exclude
from the kingdom of Heaven; but in that case after long contact
with public business, he
might probably have contracted great defilement. For it is an
exceedingly rare thing for one who is moving in the midst of such
great evils to hold a straight course, but to go astray, both
wittingly and against his will, is a natural thing, and one which
constantly occurs. But, as it is, we have been relieved from this
apprehension, and we are firmly persuaded that in the great day he
will appear in much radiance, shining forth near the King, and
going with the angels in advance of Christ and clad with the robe
of unutterable glory, and standing by the side of the King as he
gives judgment, and acting as one of His chief ministers. Wherefore
desisting from mourning and lamentation do thou hold on to the same
way of life as his, yea even let it be more exact, that having
speedily attained an equal standard of virtue with him, you may
inhabit the same abode and be united to him again through the
everlasting ages, not in this union of marriage but another far
better. For this is only a bodily kind of intercourse, but then
there will be a union of soul with soul more perfect, and of a far
more delightful and far nobler kind.E.C.F. INDEX & SEARCH
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